


Shotarella: A Vocaloid Parody

by Hatsunation



Category: Vocaloid
Genre: Comedy, Crack, M/M, One Shot, One-Sided Relationship, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-30
Updated: 2014-09-30
Packaged: 2018-02-19 09:29:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2383316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hatsunation/pseuds/Hatsunation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Len is a maid, Neru and Miku are bipolar, Meiko is a mother, Rin is a fairy god sister, and Kaito is a gay prince. Rated T becuase of language. ONE SHOT.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shotarella: A Vocaloid Parody

"Yo Len! Get your ass down here and clean up this shit!" A voice screamed.

Len sighed with dismay, "Why do I have to do this anyway? We're rich enough, just hire a maid."

He trudged down the stairs holding a dust pan and brush. A woman with brown hair smirked at him, "Your dress has wrinkles. Fix it."

Len smoothed out the wrinkles of his super frilly French maid dress. It's not like he enjoyed wearing it, but Meiko and his evil step sisters, Miku and Neru forced him into it.

He crouched down and began sweeping up the pieces of a crystal vase that had been smashed against a wall. Miku and Neru were always fighting over who was prettier, which usually lead to broken décor or clumps of hair strewn across the floor.

Meiko frowned but said with amusement, "Now if you crouch down like that I won't be able to get a view."

Len blushed madly, "It's easier to clean this way."

Meiko laughed, "Come on! Bend over! Show those lacy panties of yours!"

Len sobbed quietly, "I don't wear panties…"

Meiko giggled and spun on her heel to leave. On her way out the room she knocked over a bust of some old guy off its pedestal. "Clean that up too while you're at it," She called over her shoulder.

She stopped suddenly and said, "Oh yes when you're done, make sure to assist Miku and Neru with getting ready for the Royal Jam."

Len replied quietly, "Yes Meiko."

"What was that? I can't hear you!" She yelled with a grin.

"YES MEIKO!" He screamed.

She laughed and said, "No need to yell."

She sauntered off humming a tune. Len righted himself up to a standing position. What kind of horrors would wait for him inside his sisters' room? As far as he was concerned, he hoped it would just be something minor like brushing their partially bald head rather than being forced to stand there for hours watching them switch into one ugly dress after another with flashes of their boobs in between. He walked into the main hall and began marching up the marble stairs to the lair.

As soon as he opened the door, teal pigtails slapped his face whacking him to the ground.

"I'll fuckin' kill you Neru!" Miku yelled.

Neru stood inside the room holding the tattered remains of what was once another one of the countless ugly dresses they owned, "I'd like to see you try bitch! I'll be the one to marry Prince Kaito and you aren't going to stop me!"

Miku roared with rage. She whipped her head back and forth looking for a weapon.

Her murderous eyes fell onto Len. She grabbed his small ponytail and chucked him at Neru. Neru grabbed a mannequin and used it as a bat to smash the flying Len into the ceiling. Miku went charging and Neru with her eyes thirsting for blood. As Neru was arching her nails to be claws the ceiling crumbled away burying them in a layer of plaster. Len popped his head through the rubble to see Neru and Miku hugging each other.

"I'm so sorry!" They sobbed to one another.

Len rubbed his head, "They're so bipolar."

They turned to him. "Well, clean it up," Miku commanded.

She then turned to Neru and began prancing around the rubble filled room looking for dresses. After a few flashes and squeezing into tiny dresses, they finally announced the end of the modeling. They modeled the hideous dresses while squealing with glee.

"We'll be the best dressed people at the Jam!" Miku giggled.

Neru nodded, "No one will even stand a chance in winning Kaito's heart!"

They pranced out the room dancing and singing. Len whipped his brow and stumbled out the room after them. At the foot of the stairs, Miku and Neru fantasized about the Royal jam, discussing what they would do down to the last zeptosecond.

Meiko finally emerged from her room modeling a brilliant red dress that might end with being mistaken for a fire truck.

"Well then Len, as you know we will be going to the Royal Jam and you'll have to spend the night cleaning like all maids do. Anyway, we're off!" Meiko announced.

They strolled out the door into the warm night air. Len sighed with relief, he wasn't going to clean since they wouldn't even notice if he didn't. He decided he'd take it easy, catch up with Pokémon on TV, anything not related to cleaning.

As he was just about to plop down on the couch he heard a high pitch voice announce, "The most wonder Rin of Kagamines is here!"

Len glanced over to see a blond haired girl with brilliant blue eyes adorned with shimmering orangish- yellow clothing with a giant blow set atop her head.

"What's with that ridiculous getup? Especially that stupid ribbon," Len commented.

She pressed her mouth into a thin line, "Oh yeah? Explain your tacky hairstyle! It's impossible for anyone to be born with hair that dumb looking!"

"My hair isn't dumb looking!" Len whined.

She smiled, "Oh yeah… It's your face!" She laughed wildly at her own joke.

Len sweat dropped, "Ok… Anyway, what do you want?"

She quickly composed herself trying to seem as professional as possible, "I'm here to make your dreams come true!"

"Why?" Len asked blandly.

"Because I'm supposed to since I'm you're…. Fairy god sister!" She decreed dramatically.

"That's so cliché though," Len complained.

"No it's not!" She yelled, "It's 100% original! I think…"

"You think?" Len asked.

"Whatever! I'm going to make your dreams come true by sending you to the Royal Jam so you and Kaito can fall in love and live happily ever after!" She exclaimed.

"I'm straight though!" Len yelled.

"Too bad!" She smiled.

She waved a wand in the air that had a glowing orange on the end. After a blinding burst of orange peels, he found himself in a yellow and white dress with big poufy sleeves. "Now hurry! We have to make love happen before 8 o' clock or it will be too late!"

"Why eight?" Len pestered.

She grinned while rubbing the back of her head, "It's my curfew. Anyway, to the Jam!"

She grabbed Len's wrist and dragged him outside. She waved her head back and forth like she was looking for something, "Hm! Nothing here is good enough to be a vehicle so we'll just use the house!"

She waved her orange topped wand at the house. The house began to crawl out the ground and slowly started shifting into something.

Len screamed, "Not the house!"

In place of the house was now a giant monster road roller.

She smiled with approval, "That's what I'm talking about!"

She then turned to Len and smacked his butt with her wand, "Yo, slow poke! You're going to have to move faster than that if you're going to make it in time!"

Len grumbled but climbed into the road roller. As soon as he sat down in the seat the giant machine burst forward going a zillion miles per hour. As Len screamed in shock he could hear Rin cheering and urging the road roller to go faster.

Within minutes a stadium with lights flashing from within began approaching. The road roller burst through the walls on the stadium right into the Royal Jam. Monster trucks of all sizes rolled around a dirt floor circled by stands filled with the cheering idiot citizens of the kingdom.

Rin then smiled at Len, "Now it's up to you. Go kick their asses!"

She disappeared in a poof of orange peels. In a yellow monster truck that resembled a cell phone covered in leeks he saw Neru and Miku running over trucks under their huge wheels.

Miku turned her head noticing the road roller for the first time, "Time to get pummeled you punk-ass bitch!"

The machine bursted forward to him with frightening speed. For the first time Len noticed that scattered across the dash board of their truck was about 5 banana peels, the same amount that was supposed to be waiting for him on the kitchen counter.

He trembled with rage, "You banana stealing fuckers!"

The road roller skidded across the floor with surprising speed. He crumpled their truck beneath him along with many others. He began driving across the arena screaming curses at nearly everyone.

On one side of the arena Rin was standing next to Prince Kaito, "He's quite the charmer isn't he."

Kaito nodded dreamily, "They'll make a good wife."

An electronic beep sounded from within Rin pocket. She pulled out her cell phone, "Oh shit its 7: 50! I got to go! See ya around Kaito-chan!"

She disappeared and reappeared next to Len inside the road roller, "Len we got to go! It's almost eight!"

Len nodded and trampled over more on the stadiums walls and drove off to where the house was supposed to be.

The road roller then unfolded itself back into the fancy house it was before. Len stood inside the main hall back in the maid costume, just as it used to be.

Rin smiled and said, "Well my work here is done! Oh yeah, if you see Kaito again tell him that I still think oranges beat out ice cream."

She then disappeared just as Miku, Neru, and Meiko came through the door.

"I can't believe we lost the derby to some gay cross dressing fag!" Neru whined.

"Ah I'm so pissed off! Len go fetch me a leek!" Miku ranted.

Len handed her a leek from a table a few feet away.

"Well it's been a long night," Meiko cooed, "It'll be better in the morning."

The trio trudged upstairs to their lairs for slumber, while Len on the other hand, went to a closet under the stairs.

Early in the mourning Len awoke to a banging on the door. He stumbled out into the brightly lit foyer and opened the hall. Standing there was prince Kaito and a few servants.

"Excuse me commoner, do you know anyone who lives here that was driving a road roller at last night's Royal Jam?" Prince Kaito asked.

"I was," Len stated blandly.

"So you are my true love who sounded like an angel from heaven last night! Speaking such words of love! You will be mine!"

Len stared at him in horror, "I'm straight you gay fag!"

He slammed the door in the Princes face. Len then walked out the back door of the house away from the gayness that was the Prince of whatever.

The End!


End file.
